Who Are We?

We are an Organization of Chapters: Single moms and custodial dads throughout the United States who get together for fun functions, network with and support each other! Divorced for nearly five years, Spencer Betz knows first hand the trials, tribulations and hardships, both financial and emotional, that comes with being a single parent. Her daughter, just seventeen months old at the time she and her husband divorced, became the focus of her life and after more than four years, Spencer recognized the fact that her world had become small, very small. She felt alone. In late November 1998, Spencer was invited to join first a Rotary Club and then a Optimist Club. She declined both invitations informing both inviting organizations that if she were ever going to "do" something, she would do something for single moms. There are groups who help the homeless, and that's a good thing, the homeless need help. There are groups who help veterans and children, both very worthy causes. There are even groups who save the whales. But where's a group that helps single moms? Spencer got on her soapbox and began carrying the word that single moms have the hardest job in the world and they deserve a break. People listened. Within three weeks Spencer did "do" something. She went to a local auto dealership, North County Ford of Vista and asked if would they give single moms a well deserved break and pay the cost of putting on a movie night for single moms to get out. She had already gained the support of Star Theater in Oceanside, who had agreed to rent the theater and the film First Wives Club, at cost. North County Ford of Vista not only paid for the theater, their Executive Vice-President of Sales and Leasing, Michael Kosokawski (who is single), co-hosted the event with Spencer. Newspapers, television and radio stations carried the message of the free event. The publicity resulted in hundreds of telephone calls. One newspaper had printed the story (What Is A Single Mom?). A story written by Spencer. She received calls from women who were in tears over the story. They too had felt alone.The calls and support were inspirational. Single moms weren't the only ones who called. Attorneys, counselors, state, county and city agencies called with their support. Brothers, grandmothers and neighbors of single moms telephoned. Former single moms, now married, offered support by way of babysitting for the special event. Single custodial dads called and asked if they qualified to attend the event. The response was overwhelming. On December 16, 1998 "Single Moms Free Night At The Movies" took place. Twenty (single) firemen greeted and handed roses to the hundreds of single moms who showed for the event. Each single mom was offered a glass of wine, a free ticket to return to the theater, a ticket stub for a prize drawing and then personally escorted to her seat on the arm of a fireman. The firemen brought their gear and we even had ladies dressing up in fireman suits for pictures. It didn't stop there. An electrical contemporary band performed a wonderful two-hour concert for this very appreciative audience. Spencer then gave away, by drawing, more than $11,000 in gifts and gift certificates which had been donated by single mom-friendly business who supported Spencer's belief that single moms well-deserved a free night out. Many of these business wanted to give a discount to single moms on a full time basis and as a result of that generosity we are proud to be able to direct you to the merchants who have continued to support M.O.M.S. by offering members a discount with the use of their membership card. Today we call those merchants "V.I.P. MERCHANTS." The event, far from perfect, was a great beginning . . . and as the months go by, Spencer sees, as do so many others that there is no end to the possibilities and resources that M.O.M.S. can and will strive to provide. So if you are reading this and want to make a difference in your life and that of others, join M.O.M.S. today and support the organization that supports you.	M.O.M.S. Board Members

read what Dan Kraft wrote about M.O.M.S in the 13-Dec-1998 Sunday San Diego Union-Tribune... From the North County Times, December 6, 1998: "You're divorced, huh mom?" my five year old asked recently. "Yes Jaimi, I'm divorced." I answered, wondering where this might go next. Silence filled the car for a brief moment. "What's a single mom? . . . Oh, I know what it is mom," she answered knowingly. "What is a single mom Jaimi, do want to tell me?" I encouraged, curious as to how much her five year old mind understood. "A single mom is someone who doesn't have a dad." she answered. It wasn't a question, it was a statement and my five year old was satisfied at that point with the conversation. What is a single mom? What a complex question, I thought. It's a woman who's a mom AND a dad. She's someone who's has most likely mastered multiple professions. She's a teacher, nurse, doctor and a counselor. An accountant and chief financial officer. She's the police guarding and protecting her offspring desperately trying to keep them safe and out of trouble. A single mom is a playmate. Always dressing Barbie exactly as instructed. She's the perfect outfielder that never tires of chasing those "almost" home run balls. She's a Coach, encouraging good sportsmanship and ability in her children. A single mom is a subsidiary of the transit system, forever solely responsible for the transportation and delivery of her child. She's an economist, stretching her dollar to provide the necessities. She's a mechanic who with only a few odd and end tools, puts together multiple toys with hundreds of nuts and bolts. Never showing tears of frustration or a thought of giving up. She's fast and she's creative. She's loving and patient . . . but most off all she's tired. There is no one to help at the end of the day. No one to shoulder the responsibility. Being a single mom is a job that many, too many, do single-handedly or with little help at all. It's a job that many think they will not survive. Although they will. It's isolating, often cutting her off from the rest of world. She's a woman who has cried herself to sleep at night because she's not superwoman and she feel short that day in courage or endurance. Exhaustion is constantly present in her life but she can't stop. Who would take over? Dreams of a Caribbean island vacation, a place where all she would do is relax and be pampered, keep her going. Will it happen, probably not. Or at least not for many years to come. I pull into the driveway and look over at my daughter. "I love you Jaimi . . . more than anything in the whole universe!" I tell her, and turn the ignition key off. "I love you more, Mom!" she answers with a huge smile on her beautiful face. I smile back, realizing that being a single mom may be the most difficult challenge I have ever faced...but it is by far the most rewarding.	Spencer & jaimi Betz make two new friends at a single parent get-together

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